This is definitely the week to kill off Grandma and collect on the will. With the family vacationing in Europe and Grandma's catatonic condition showing signs of improvement, Venus pushes the stars in your favor. However, hold off on blackmailing your boss with those prostitute photo's until after Thanksgiving when he's most vulnerable. Financially, you're due for a bad week. You just can't expect to keep running that credit card scam and not get caught, especially at Burger King. They're bound to start asking questions. Romantically, watch for some old hag with tons of money to move into the neighborhood sometime soon. If you play your cards right, that 91 year-old walking piggy bank could quite possibly become your sugar mama.

Well, all of your stalking ways finally pay off this week as the one you admire will have a remarkable change of heart. Ignore the restraining orders, she really does want to be with you forever! Now is the time to skip the usual pranks and go for the grand finale. The romantic in you comes out when you blindfold, gag, and kidnap her in the middle of the night. Just a reminder, kidnapping becomes a federal offense once you have crossed state lines, so be on the lookout for all those pesky state welcoming signs. 
Lucky numbers this week: 3, 25, 11, 8, 612